The world preaches a message of self-care and boundaries. It says, “this far and no more.” And it sounds good. It sounds good and is good to take care of yourself, to stand up for yourself and to have healthy boundaries in toxic relationships. But what does that look like for a Christian?
It's no shock when I'm impatient with my husband. He's slow and methodical. He doesn't do anything in a hurry. He’s the opposite of me in this way and I love it about him. It's clear I needed to marry a man who measures my temperament with his steadiness. This characteristic of my husband is a means of grace from God to help me grow.
It also drives me nuts.
The point is that you need to marry someone you can have a happy conversation with, someone who enjoys at least some of the things that you do. Marriage is not meant to be miserable.
Dying to self is painful, but dying in miserable sin is way worse.
Girls can be placed in an awkward position when they are asked out. How should a girl turn down a guy? Can a woman serve her brother in Christ who goes out on a limb to ask her out on a date? The apostle Paul tells us that whether we eat or drink, we should do everything to the glory of God. This does not exclude the moment when a girl is faced with the decision to say no to a pursuer
As I tossed and turned in the wee hours of the morning, my frustration grew; not with the speakers of the words I obsessed over, but with myself. It was clear to me that I had become a woman whose worth felt threatened by other’s opinions.
When we sin against God and the people around us, turning from that sin toward reconciliation actually begins with confession and then repentance . . . not just expressing emotional remorse. Of course we can still be sorry that we sinned, but to repent we also must ask ourselves, what are we really sorry for?
Many of us have been wounded by some of the pitfalls in attempting friendship with the opposite sex. Many can sense that something in the way we handle these relationships is “off,” but maybe we’re not sure exactly what. As Christians, how do we negotiate what is appropriate and inappropriate between men and women in friendship while honoring both purity and family?
“Your marriage is not your own. Stop treating it like it is. You WILL destroy it if you continue to act as if it belongs only to you. Not because you necessarily want to, but you can’t help yourself apart from me. If you aren’t living for Me, you are only living for yourself. At any moment in your given life, if you aren’t living to glorify Me---you are striving for your own glory. Stop. Or you will destroy everything I have given you.”
When Harry Met Sally made the question famous, but it’s been one we’ve been throwing around for at least the last century. Society has changed; the days of men in the field and women in the kitchen are by and large distant memories. Today, men and women are side by side in just about every arena. Men and women do not just meet in order to get married and have babies, but are co-workers and equals in the business world. This has forced men and woman to learn how to interact with one another outside of romantic relationships.
I get it, we don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. It’s the last thing we want to do. So when someone asks you out or you realize your dating relationship isn’t going to end in marriage be honest with the other person. Sometimes the most caring and loving thing to do when a relationship is over—is by telling the other person.