Rather than embracing God’s love, trusting God’s plan for their current stage of life, and serving the church selflessly, they make single people become more inward and selfish. When we think and speak like this, we may be revealing more about our hearts than we realize in the moment.
The point is that you need to marry someone you can have a happy conversation with, someone who enjoys at least some of the things that you do. Marriage is not meant to be miserable.
Girls can be placed in an awkward position when they are asked out. How should a girl turn down a guy? Can a woman serve her brother in Christ who goes out on a limb to ask her out on a date? The apostle Paul tells us that whether we eat or drink, we should do everything to the glory of God. This does not exclude the moment when a girl is faced with the decision to say no to a pursuer
. . . in a land of limitless options, we feel like we should be able to find the perfect, indisputably best choice. This is the promise of online dating: you’ll be able to find the perfect person for you—the flawless mate.
Who wouldn’t want to convert in order to marry the person they are crazy about? Who wouldn’t want to say “yes" to Jesus in order for their significant other to say “yes” to them?
When Harry Met Sally made the question famous, but it’s been one we’ve been throwing around for at least the last century. Society has changed; the days of men in the field and women in the kitchen are by and large distant memories. Today, men and women are side by side in just about every arena. Men and women do not just meet in order to get married and have babies, but are co-workers and equals in the business world. This has forced men and woman to learn how to interact with one another outside of romantic relationships.
If I apply the gospel to my desire for marriage, I come to realize that God won’t give me a husband because I’ve achieved it and reached “equilibrium.” If God does give me my husband, it will be in His own time, in His infinite wisdom, and as a gift, not as a prize that I’ve earned, but as something that is for my good and His glory. What freedom! I no longer have to hold myself to impossible standards. I’m free to trust God with my life and I’m free from the fear of messing up or failing to attain “equilibrium.”
Our walls and towers aren’t crafted of brick and mortar instead they are crafted of fear, worry, and anxiety. They aren’t just our fears or worries, other people are also contributing to them. While I’m speaking figuratively, when we quote the lines from Proverbs 4:23, “guard your heart” this is what we picture . . . a strong wall protecting us from pain and heartache. When others say this to us they are adding their own fears and worries to our self-made walls, adding to the over protectiveness of our hearts.
“Well it will all work out because God is Sovereign…right?” or “It’s all good, God is sovereign.” Who talks like this? Well, I for one have and thinking back I just want to apologize to anyone whom I may have ever said this to. I often would say this after I made a careless decision or I felt the need to affirm someone that was going through a trial.
I get it, we don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. It’s the last thing we want to do. So when someone asks you out or you realize your dating relationship isn’t going to end in marriage be honest with the other person. Sometimes the most caring and loving thing to do when a relationship is over—is by telling the other person.